Menu

 Authors
A B C D E F
G H I J K L
M N O P Q R
S T U V W S
Y Z
Get Socialize
My Account
Make Free Wallpaper

435 Humorist Quotes

Sophistication might be described as the ability to cope gracefully with a situation involving the presence of a formidable menace to one's poise and prestige...

Sophistication Described Ability Cope gracefully
  Favorite Make wallpaper

To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other and to feel. That is the purpose of life.

World Behind walls Draw closer
  Favorite Make wallpaper

There is something about a poet which leads us to believe that he died, in many cases, as long as 20 years before his birth.

Poet Believe Leads Died
  Favorite Make wallpaper

A drawing is always dragged down to the level of its caption. A word to the wise is not sufficient if it doesn't make sense.

Drawing Dragged down Level Wise
  Favorite Make wallpaper

It is all but impossible to sit quietly by when someone is throwing salad plates.

Impossible Sit quietly Throwing
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Time lies frozen there. It's always Then. It's never Now.

Times lies Frozen Never now
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Lately, I have been wondering if there is time left for daydreaming in this 21st-century world of constant communication.

Wondering Time left Daydreaming World
  Favorite Make wallpaper

But what is all this fear of and opposition to Oblivion? What is the matter with the soft Darkness, the Dreamless Sleep?

Fear Opposition Oblivion Matter
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Man has always assumed that his is the highest form of life in the universe. There is, of course, nothing at all with which to sustain this view.

Man Assumed Highest form Life
  Favorite Make wallpaper

To call such persons "humorists", a loose-fitting and ugly word, is to miss the nature of their dilemma and the dilemma of their nature.

Person Humorist Nature Dilemma
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.

Progress Right Too long
  Favorite Make wallpaper
Man is troubled by what might be called the Dog Wish, a strange and involved compulsion to be as happy and carefree as a dog.
Man Troubled Dog wish Happy
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Against the may, the could be, and the should, folly 'tis to balance doubt or hope.

Against May Folly Hope
  Favorite Make wallpaper

I saw old autumn in the misty morn Stand shadowless like silence, listening To silence.

Old autumn Misty morn Stand shadow less Silence
  Favorite Make wallpaper

I remember, I remember, The house where I was born, The little window where the sun Came peeping in at morn.

Remember The house Was born Little window
  Favorite Make wallpaper
Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine!
To choose Mine Love Every day
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Half of the failures in life come from pulling one's horse when he is leaping

The failure In life Pulling One's horse
  Favorite Make wallpaper

The lily is all in white, like a saint, And so is no mate for me.

The lily White Like Saint
  Favorite Make wallpaper

My brain is dull, my sight is foul, I cannot write a verse, or read-- Then, Pallas, take away thine Owl, And let us have a lark instead.

My brain Sight Write Lark instead
  Favorite Make wallpaper

With fingers weary and worn, With eyelids heavy and red, A woman sat in unwomanly rags, Plying her needle and thread.

Fingers weary Worn Eyelids heavy Woman sat
  Favorite Make wallpaper

A moment's thinking is an hour in words

Moment's thinking An hour In words
  Favorite Make wallpaper

To attempt to advise conceited people is like whistling against the wind.

Attempt Advise Conceited people Whistling
  Favorite Make wallpaper

There is a silence where hath been no sound, There is a silence where no sound may be,- In the cold grave, under the deep, deep sea, Or in the wide desert where no life is found.

Silence No sound May be Cold grave
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Some dreams we have are nothing else but dreams, Unnatural and full of contradictions; Yet others of our most romantic schemes, Are something more than fictions.

Some dreams Unnatural Contradictions Most romantic
  Favorite Make wallpaper

O men with sisters dear, O men with mothers and wives, It is not linen you 're wearing out, But human creatures' lives!

Men Sisters Mothers Wives
  Favorite Make wallpaper

No blessed leisure for love or hope, But only time for grief

No blessed Leisure For love Only time
  Favorite Make wallpaper
I resolved that, like the sun, as long as my day lasted, I would look on the bright side of everything.
Resolved The sun Day lasted Look on
  Favorite Make wallpaper

How bless'd the heart that has a friend. A sympathizing ear to lend

How bless Heart A friend Sympathizing ear
  Favorite Make wallpaper

I love thee - I love thee, 'Tis all that I can say, It is my vision in the night, My dreaming in the day

Love Can say My vision Night
  Favorite Make wallpaper
Peace and rest at length have come, All the day's long toil is past; And each heart is whispering,
Peace Rest Have come Long toil
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Our very hopes belied our fears, Our fears our hopes belied; We thought her dying when she slept, And sleeping when she died.

Very hope Belied Fear Hopes
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Sometimes the sins you haven't committed are all you have left to hold onto.

Sometimes The sins Haven't committed Have left
  Favorite Make wallpaper

If I could believe in myself, why not give other improbabilities the benefit of the doubt?

Could believe In myself Other improbabilities
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings

Real love Withholding The truth Perfect opportunity
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

Procrastination The art Keep up With yesterday
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Happiness is the interval between periods of unhappiness.

Happiness The internal Between period Unhappiness
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Punctuality is one of the cardinal business virtues: always insist on it in your subordinates.

Punctuality Is one The cardinal Business virtue
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.

Age Interesting subject Get old Is live
  Favorite Make wallpaper

An optimist is a guy that has never had much experience.

An optimist Never had Much experience
  Favorite Make wallpaper

I would rather start a family than finish one.

Rather start A family Finish one
  Favorite Make wallpaper

The chief obstacle to the progress of the human race is the human race.

Chief obstacle The progress Human race
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Successful people are the ones who think up things for the rest of the world to keep busy at.

Successful people The ones Think up Things
  Favorite Make wallpaper

A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.

A pessimist A person To listen Many optimists
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Fate often puts all the material for happiness and prosperity into a man's hands just to see how miserable he can make himself with them.

Fate The material For happiness Prosperity
  Favorite Make wallpaper

A demagogue is a person with whom we disagree as to which gang should mismanage the country.

A demagogue A person We disagree Should mismanage
  Favorite Make wallpaper

An idea isn't responsible for the people who believe in it.

An idea Responsible The people Believe in
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Some persons are likable in spite of their unswerving integrity.

Some people Likable Unswerving integrity
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Ideas pull the trigger, but instinct loads the gun.

Ideas pull The trigger Instinct loads The gun
  Favorite Make wallpaper

Honesty is a good thing, but it is not profitable to its possessor unless it is kept under control.

Honesty Good thing Not profitable Its possessor
  Favorite Make wallpaper

There is nothing so habit-forming as money.

Nothing Habit forming As money
  Favorite Make wallpaper