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237 Presenter Quotes

People who live in a glass house have to answer the door.

Glass House Door Live
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The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any.

Job Kids Manners Learning
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I don't want to be the oldest performer in captivity... I don't want to look like a little old man dancing out there.

Captivity Dancing Like Little
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I just put my feet in the air and move them around.
Air Around Feet Just
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The higher up you go, the more mistakes you are allowed. Right at the top, if you make enough of them, it's considered to be your style.

Allowed Considered Enough Go
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I have no desire to prove anything by dancing. I have never used it as an outlet or a means of expressing myself. I just dance. I just put my feet in the air and move them around.

Air Anything Around Dance
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This search for what you want is like tracking something that doesn't want to be tracked. It takes time to get a dance right, to create something memorable.

Create Dance Get Like
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To me, a cat is an easy pet, they don't need any spoiling or looking after.
After An Cat Easy
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I don't watch much telly, the telly hardly goes on, but the things I do watch are sort of nature programs, and something about the oceans and the amount of weird fish that's in there.

About Amount Fish Goes
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But I'm not an idiot. At the end of the day, I've learned a lot.

Day End End Of The Day Idiot
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I've never understood the 'things to do before you die' idea. If I was ill, I'd be in no mood to have a swim with a dolphin.

Before Die Dolphin Idea
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A slug is always on its own. It's a lonely insect.
Always Insect Lonely Own
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When you've been on a programme called 'An Idiot Abroad' job offers aren't exactly flying in.

Abroad Been Exactly Flying
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I'm not invited to any exciting parties and my life hasn't really changed.

Any Changed Exciting Invited
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I came face-to-face with a gorilla which was quite good, but it was a 10-hour trek in bad weather, up hills, covered in mud, with mosquitoes everywhere and when we got there the gorilla's just sat there doing nowt.

Bad Bad Weather Came Covered
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I've got loads of nieces and nephews.

Got Loads Nephews Nieces
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You know, when you're a producer, you're a bit of a lackey. You're just making cups of tea and making sure they've got newspaper, stuff like that.

Bit Cups Got Just
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It's not a joke: I really do like being at home.
Being Home Joke Like
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I just sort of go along and say what I think -and that's all you can do in life, really.

Along Go I Think Just
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The reason I did the book about holidays is that you're a different person on holiday. You're sleeping somewhere unfamiliar, knocking about with people you've never met and for 10 days you're someone else. You're out of your comfortable zone.

About Book Comfortable Days
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Comedy's really subjective, you know.

Comedy Know Really Subjective
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If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this - two books, some television and everything - I'd panic, I'd be scared.

Books Don Everything Five
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When I go on holiday and people ask me what I do, I tell them I do some internet stuff and I've done a couple of books and I hope they just leave it at that.

Ask Books Couple Done
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I had a bad experience doing public speaking at school. I had to talk about a pen for five minutes and it was really hard work. I couldn't wait to get off the stage.

About Bad Doing Experience
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Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight.

Buy Came Challenge Did
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That's the problem with having a bald head. It exaggerates the shape.

Bald Exaggerate Having Head
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To be honest, marriage doesn't scare me and that, it's just once you've been together for so long, if you haven't got any kids it's just a big expensive day out for everyone else to enjoy, isn't it?

Any Been Big Day
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And we've got a toaster and everything. So there is no reason for the wedding.
Everything Got No Reason Reason
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Sometimes you can know too much. A lot of brainy people like Stephen Fry are quite depressive.

Brainy Depressive Fry Know
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I've never won many awards, I didn't get certificates for swimming or anything.

Anything Awards Get Many
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I mean, I don't really go out at night in terms of noisy, busy places; I prefer more of a quiet corner somewhere.

Busy Corner Go Mean
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It's like there's some unwritten rule that if you're mates, you can say what you want to each other, and you don't really get that annoyed about it.

About Annoyed Each Get
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I don't know what the future is, but you just do it whilst it's there, don't you?

Future Just Just Do It Know
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I drive a car, like an adult. Not brilliantly. I'm not great.

Adult Brilliantly Car Drive
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At the end of the day, teachers aren't going to mess about trying to make me into an Einstein, 'cause it was never gonna happen. We can't all be brainy, can we? That's just the way the world is.

About Brainy Cause Day
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The poorer people and criminals of Mexico who are not very religious but not quite atheists, either, worship Saint Death.

Atheists Criminals Death Either
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I've never thought about it before, but I suppose bad people might need someone to pray to, too.

About Bad Bad People Before
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Chinese people age overnight.

Age Chinese Chinese People Overnight
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People who live in glass houses... have to answer the door.

Answer Door Glass Houses
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I found that being with happy positive people annoys me.

Annoys Being Found Happy
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I'm not a proper traveler. I don't like to be challenged or have too much of a change and prefer a week away just to relax.

Away Challenged Change Just
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If you go away with, you know, a girlfriend, wife, whatever, you have an argument on holiday because you're not used to spending that much time with people.

Argument Away Because Girlfriend
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I've learnt that, even though I've travelled about, I haven't changed that much.

About Changed Even Learnt
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I've never worried about life's big questions.
About Big Big Questions Life
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With evolution, things are always changing, so I sort of think: Should we all be growing three heads?

Always Changing Evolution Growing
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I think it's mental to pay for water. Where is that water coming from? Are they in the hills puttin' it into bottles when years ago it used to roll down and go into the lakes?

Bottles Coming Down Go
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People eat duck and you think, well, we've got loads of chickens, leave the ducks alone!

Alone Chickens Duck Ducks
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I don't think I'd be a very good parent. I'd be too honest.

Good Good Parent Honest Parent
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Parrots have gone a bit quiet since pirates have gone.
Bit Gone Pirates Quiet
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Comedy's really subjective, you know; that's why it's so hard.

Comedy Hard Know Really
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